teamnoir (teamnoir) wrote in polypagans,

Recovering from Cheating

I have a strange question for this group.

In monogamy, when there has been an indiscretion, (cheating), the standard advice usually given is to:

Step #1: end the affair
Step #2: rebuild trust

The alternative, of course, is either to open the relationship, which would seem to me to be extremely difficult following a betrayal like cheating. Or to end the first relationship, resulting in a sort of overlapping serial monogamy.

Question: Are there any other plausible or practical approaches?

I've always known that cheating was possible in a poly context, but I've never paid much attention to it because it just seemed so silly and pointless. But I find myself in a situation like that now. And I'm wondering...

How do people recover? Does it require ending the "affair"? Has anyone successfully recovered the original relationship without ending the affair?
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